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Sunday, May 29, 2005

Stuff portrait...um....Sunday - religious stuff

Religious stuff
Originally uploaded by alexiecfo.
This is a cross that has holders for candles behind it and I really love it.

I know I know I know I am two days late on this and I apologize. :)

Elizabeth at 10:17 AM


Purses and shoes

Originally uploaded by alexiecfo.
Yes people, I am a purse WHORE and proud of it. The one I am currently carrying is the lime green one. The laundry basket o' purses is usually up in the closet. I have more shoes but they are all in the closet too and it is not pretty in there. Um, take no note to the laundry on the floor.

Elizabeth at 10:14 AM


Outside of fridge

Outside of fridge
Originally uploaded by alexiecfo.
There is normally a lot of crap on here - grocery list (which I carefully make and then LEAVE RIGHT THERE when I go to the store), pictures, vet appt reminders, and a very sweet note from my niece. :)

Elizabeth at 10:12 AM


Inside the fridge

Inside the fridge
Originally uploaded by alexiecfo.
Am I the only person who uses a vegetable crisper to store Diet Coke??? FYI - that bad boy holds 2 12 packs. Gotta love it. And if I ever run out of salsa in my house, you best watch out.

Elizabeth at 10:11 AM


Friday, May 27, 2005

Happy happy joy joy

OK, I know I am a giant slack ass for not having posted my STUFF for Stuff Portrait Friday but I have good reasons. I promise. That being said, I gotta share my good news. I just got off the phone with the husband and we have our financing approved for a house. I could fucking just burst. We are approved up to an amount that I am very comfortable with. I believe we can for sure find a house in that price range that we are happy with and most importantly, can AFFORD. Key word there. We are going house hunting next Saturday since our realtor is out of town this weekend. I am absolutely thrilled. I hope that the process goes as smoothly as it has thus far. Have I mentioned that I am so damn excited that I could do cartwheels down the damn hallway except I can't because we have clients in the office today?

Elizabeth at 12:59 PM


Interview questions from Sherri

The rules are that I had to request to be interviewed on her blog and then she emailed me the questions. Then I post a link to this post in her comment section. I am not sure how to do that in the least. How cute that she thinks I am not a computer moron like I really am. LOLOL. Anyway, here goes:

1. Describe your ideal day. I would get up whenever I damn well pleased. Get dressed and go grab the Sunday giant newspaper out of my yard and go eat breakfast out while plotting what I will buy from all the sale papers. Then I will take a nice leisurely drive to the beach with my doggie. It is a nice drive down country roads and tiny towns so you have to take your time and just enjoy the scenery. Then I would watch my psychotic dog run and play in the waves with his flippy frisbee thing. Then we would all come back to town and eat somewhere yummy on the way back. The dog would pass out in the back and snooze the whole way back (which never ever happens even if he is so exhausted his little eyes droop). Once I got home, I would get a foot massage and leg massage and eat my weight in Reese cups that have no affect on my weight. Then off to bed.

2. Do a lot of people in your "real" life know about your blog? FUCK NO. My husband does and that is it. How on earth could I be as honest and sometimes mean if my friends and family would read this shit. I have them convinced I am a nice girl.

3. When was the last time you really indulged yourself? What did you do? This is hard because frankly I do not indulge myself often. The first thing that springs to mind is that I took my lunch yesterday and ran across the street to Macy's to look around and bought a super cute summery outfit - which I am now wearing because it is Casual Friday.

4. What is your favorite joke? OK, this is so lame and yet every time I hear it or tell it, I disolve into giggles like I am all of FOUR. Knock knock. Who's there? Interupting cow. Interupting cow who? MOOOO!!!!! The deal is you gotta scream the moo as the person is in the middle of saying "interupting cow who?" It fucking slays me every time. I know. It's sad how lame I am.

5. What is one of your favorite childhood memories? When I could not sleep, my dad would never fuss. He would just get me out of bed at whatever time and the two of us would bake homemake cookies from scratch. I loved that.

There you have it. A small glimpse into me. Thanks to Sherri for thinking up these questions. Her blog rocks if you have not read it yet. :)

Elizabeth at 8:29 AM


Thursday, May 26, 2005

Stolen from Cherry

1. My uncle once: drove like a lunatic on a country road so that my cousin and I would laugh at the car dancing.

2. Never in my life: have I jumped out of a plane - nor will I.

3. When I was five: I was in kindergarten and I got the chicken pox. I found out because it was going around my school so my teacher decided to raise my shirt up on the fuckin playground to check and see if I had them since she saw a spot on my arm or something. Even though I was all of 5 and had no boobies to speak of, I was horrified.

4. High School was: pretty much a drunken stupor but fun as hell.

5. I will never forget: all the dialogue in the movie "Legally Blonde."

6. I once met: Phil Bourque, formerly of the Pittsburgh Penguins, in Gabriel's when I worked there while in college. He was a total dickweed when I asked him and his skanky ass wife for an autograph. Fucktard.

7. There's this girl I know: who has really ugly feet and INSISTS on wearing flip flops a lot.

8. Once, at a bar: I dropped $250 somewhere and never found it. I had earned that cash working that night waiting tables. I was not thrilled.

9. By noon I'm usually: tired and ready to get the fuck

10. Last night: I got some work done, found a house I want to move into and loved on the animals a bit.

11. If I only had: brain power to remember things that would bode well for me instead of stupid useless trivial crap.

12. Next time I go to church: I hope they do not speak in tongues because that shit freaks me out.

13. Terry Schiavo: Oh, let's not go there.

14. What worries me most: Not having a baby.

15. When I turn my head left, I see: Binders binders binders from an upcoming arbitration. I so love securities cases.

16. When I turn my head right, I see: my calendar of the Greek Isles which makes me want to go on vaca.

17. You know I'm lying when: I say I voted for Bush.

18. What I miss most about the eighties: being young and with no responsiblity.

19. If I was a character written by Shakespeare, I'd be: fuck if I know. I so never got the thrill of reading Shakespeare.

20. By this time next year: I hope to be in a new house and knocked the fuck up.

21. A better name for me would be: No clue.

22. I have a hard time understanding: how stupid people tend to have lots of money.

23. If I ever go back to school I'll: probably love it because I am the biggest dork ever created.

24. You know I like you if: I try to make you laugh.

25. If I won an award, the first person I'd thank would be: God.

26. Darwin, Mozart, Slim Pickens & Geraldine Ferraro: What the fuck?.

27. Take my advice: Never marry before the age of 25

28. My ideal breakfast is: french toast with maple syrup and bacon - none of which I cooked.

29. A song I love, but do not have is: "I Don't Wanna Be Lonely" by Rob Thomas

30. If you visit my hometown, I suggest: Michaelangelo's pizza - you could wring the grease out of that shit but it is nectar of the gods.

31. Tulips, character flaws, microchips & track stars: Something I love, something I have, something I don't understand, and something I will never be.

32. Why won't people: get the fuck out of my way when I am on my way home from work.

33. If you spend the night at my house: I will try to keep the dog from jumping on you in your sleep.

34. I'd stop my wedding for: Too late - wedding done ovah.

35. The world could do without: fucktards in general.

36. I'd rather lick the belly of a cockroach than: eat one.

37. My favorite blonde is: Not a fan of blondes, so not sure I can answer that.

38. Paper clips are: way to prevalent in my work life

39. If I do anything well, it's: Making people laugh.

40. And by the way: my undies have creeped up my ass. Pardon while I dislodge.

Elizabeth at 1:57 PM


Wednesday, May 25, 2005

Public Service Announcement

I have gotten a few comments about Seaspray from Bath and Body works. As most of you know, it has been discontinued. Being the B&BW afficionado that I am, I do know that you can get Seapspray products from time to time at their semi-annual sales which are in July and December or January. However, sometimes you can't find it even there. So you go to the next best place - ebay. I have gotten many products off there and have found it to be a reliable source of never used products. For instance, I got two of the large containers of body lotion for like 10 bucks. I mean, HI, that is cheap even when you add in shipping. So there you have it - my good deed for the day. Now if you all go out and buy out all the Seaspray on ebay, I am gonna hunt you bitches down. :)

Elizabeth at 9:34 AM


Tuesday, May 24, 2005

I am up to felony status now

I stole this from Sheri (whose blog I just discovered and LOVE). She has not yet learned that I will pilfer from everyone if given even half an opportunity. :)

Accent: A very odd combo of growing up in southern California, going to college in PA and now living in the south. So I have a twang but I still adhere to grammar normally. Make sense.
Bra size: 38D-two words - back ache
Chore I hate: Scrubbing the kitchen floor
Dad's name: Mac
Essential makeup: Mascara and lipstick
Favourite perfume: I am more of a Bath & Body works girl - fave is Seaspray which has been discontinued
Gold or silver: I like silver
Hometown: West Covina,CA
Interesting Fact: I am a fount of useless movie trivia - particularly late 80's and early 90's movies
Job Title: Paralegal
Kids: No human - just a dog and a kitty
Living arrangements: Live with the husband, our animals and my mom just recently came down to live with us
Mom's birthplace: Clairton, PA
Number of apples eaten last week: Zero
Overnight hospital stays: Never
Phobias: Heights and confinedspaces
Question you ask yourself a lot: How much can I withstand before I scream?
Religious affiliation: Grew up Methodist but now I just sleep in on Sundays
Siblings: 3 brothers, 1 sister
Time I wake up: 6:00 AM
Unnatural hair color: Never been brave enough
Natural hair color: Pukey brown in desperate need of highlights
Vegetable I refuse to eat: Brussel sprouts
Worst habit: Biting nails and picking cuticles
X-rays: Back and teeth
Yummy food I make: Lasagna, banana bread, and chocolate chip cookies
Zodiac sign: Virgo

Elizabeth at 7:40 PM


Weekend reportings

I have not been terribly prolific with the writing over the last few days but that is because I have been running around like a lunatic. Friday was really my only slightly low key day. I worked of course but then I went home where I HAD THE HOUSE TO MYSELF. Gotta love that. Then I watched "Bowling for Columbine" and did my toes. That was the extent of my evening. Perhaps it may seem a waste to let a perfectly good evening where I have no one to answer to go by like that but I love low key evenings and don't regret it a bit. Saturday more than made up for my lazy ways on Friday. I got up, cleaned the entire house top to bottom, front to back. Then I hopped in the shower and cleaned up before I went to Walmart and put yet another one of Sam Walton's kids through college. We had no food in the house so I went buck in there. I figured that once I could not squeeze even one more thing in my buggy, it might be time to go. So I went home, dumped all that shit off and proceeded to go to Sam's Club to load up on more shit - giant shit since it was Sam's, after all. Once that was completed and we were now cash poor but food rich, I baked two loaves of banana bread (which were fab if I do say so myself), did all the laundry and did a deposition summary for work. That was the busiest I have been in a while. Sunday, I made a very bad call. I love love love to eat out. AT RESTAURANTS, YOU PERVS. I am not high maintenance. I don't demand haute cuisine. I am good at Applebee's. I am a very simple girl. As long as I do not have to do dishes, it's all good by me. So I picked the Momenator up at church and she, the husband and I went to Chili's because it sounded good to me. Nevermind the fact that we were invited to a late lunch at my in-law's house at like 2ish. Noooooo. I had to have Chili's. So off we go. In the middle of the fuckin' meal, my in-law's call. "Where are you? Food is ready." Um, it was like 11:45 at this point. If the mother in law had known we were in Chili's, the wrath that would have come down upon us would have been felt on a seismic level. So we let the call go to voice mail. The husband called back to lie and say we were at Target and thought lunch was for 2 and we would be there then. So we had time to eat and try to digest this food so that we could heap more on later. We ran home briefly, picked up the Poop, and off we went. Happened upon an Open House on the way, went in, crossed the house off our list as potential living quarters and trekked on down to the in-law's house. Let me digress here briefly to let the record show that I live in Louisiana. South Louisiana. South Louisiana where it is hot as shit come May. Well, the in-laws threw a breaker or something and had no electricity. Which means no a/c. Which means that I have to periodically wring myself out and on top of that, eat fucking pot roast and not admit that I literally just came from Chili's. After ingesting an amount of pot roast so as not to arouse the suspicions of the MIL, I got the bright idea (I was full of them that day) to take the dog on a walk on the levee. Have I yet mentioned the heat? Mix the heat, with a yapping, overanxious dog, with a belly that is a tad over full and you have a not pretty picture. Fast forward to me actually returning from the walk, trying to cool off (electricity was fixed while we were gone) and then finally going home. I was all psyched because Desperate Housewives and Grey's Anatomy season finales were on, so there you go. My evening was set. All was lovely until I tried to go to bed and could not sleep. Yesterday I was such a zombie that I thought very briefly of doing my weekend reporting then, but realized that would involve movement, so I thought perhaps another time. So there you have it. My weekend in a nutshell. I did not write much but I did at least try to keep up with all of y'all and comment here and there. I am off now to do some actual billable work. Clearly one of my weekend activities was not hitting the lottery.

Elizabeth at 10:57 AM


Thursday, May 19, 2005

Stuff Portrait Day - Where I chill

Where I chill
Originally uploaded by alexiecfo.
This is my side of the bed. Bed time is beyond my favorite time of day. It was a tie between this and my back patio but I do not get out there nearly often enough so I figured this was more accurate. :)

Elizabeth at 5:47 PM


Medicine Cabinet

Medicine Cabinet
Originally uploaded by alexiecfo.
Do not have a typical medicine cabinet so here is all our crap.

Elizabeth at 5:47 PM


Best trinket from a trip

Best trinket from a trip
Originally uploaded by alexiecfo.
I got this when I was last in da Burgh. I am a maniacal Steelers fan.

Elizabeth at 5:46 PM


Wednesday, May 18, 2005

This can't be good.

Toxic by Britney Spears

"It's getting late
To give you up
I took a sip
From my devil cup
It's taking over me "

Ah, what's a year without breaking a few hearts? Literally.

What 2004 Hit Song Are You?

Seriously, just fuckin' shoot me.

Can you handle her truth? CAN YOU????

Elizabeth at 9:24 PM


Stolen from Lawbrat - because I am just that kind of girl

The One Word Meme

Okay how this goes is you choose one word and one word only to describe different aspects of yourself and/or your feelings. It’s hard to do actually but here goes:

What is the one word you would use to describe your appearance?

Favorite body part?

Least favorite body part?

Most often complimented on?

Most often criticized for?

Your romantic relationship?

Your relationship to your parents?

Your feelings about parenting?

Your hobbies?
Sedintary - SP???

Your favorite personality type for a friend?

Favorite personality type for a spouse or lover?

Favorite type of movie?

Favorite cuisine?

Favorite treat?

Favorite gift?

Most sensitive “unusual” erogenous zone?

Favorite pet?

Subject of blogging post that got the most hits?

Feelings about memes?

Since I stole this, I must thank Lawbrat. THANKS!!! I have not had time for normal posts lately since I am elbow deep in work so this will have to do for tonight unless I am inspired later. :) I have, however, kept up with all y'all fuckin' lunatics. Love it.

Elizabeth at 8:34 PM


Tuesday, May 17, 2005

Pinky Tuscadero

First off, let me just say thanks for all the compliments on my very pink bathroom. Y'all are too nice to find the beauty in that thing. However, after having really looked over the picture of my beloved Reba in the potty room, I realized that perhaps the abundance of pink is not readily apparent. The whole damn room is pink. The house has not been really updated in a good while, so the tile goes from floor to about 4 feet up. ALL PINK. Pepto fucking Bismol pink. Then the border tile, if you will, is like a marroon color. Therefore, my bathmats and "do not touch towels" are all marroon to hopefully deflect from the pink that has thrown up in there. It is just a horror. I had visions of a very muted green bathroom with very tranquil lighting and candles in there so that I may take a nice leisurely soak in peace. Instead, I am constantly reminded of diarrhea medicine. Not exactly the same thing.

Elizabeth at 3:10 PM


Monday, May 16, 2005

Behold the pink potty room

Reba - Bathroom
Originally uploaded by alexiecfo.
This is my awful bathroom - so should have put this as the ugliest thing in my house. However, this is my baby girl, Reba. She has by far the cutest personality of any little girl kitty I have ever met. She is very prissy and tends to answer me when I talk to her. Well, she is probably just meowing but to me, it is answering.

Elizabeth at 6:43 PM


Fair warning

Gage sleeping
Originally uploaded by alexiecfo.
Now that I know how to upload pictures from Flickr, you all are going to unindated with pictures of my dog. How can I not though? Look at him.

Elizabeth at 6:42 PM


Sunday, May 15, 2005

I bet she dots her I's with little fuckin' hearts

I must vent. OK, I am sitting here currently watching my new obsession "Desperate Housewives" and what invades my living room via my lovely tv? There is yet another reality show coming out. It is called "Dancing with the Stars" or some shit. I have no earthly idea what it is about - I only saw enough to know that the whore from the first Bachelorette show is on there. Let me preface this by saying that I used to be a total reality tv snob. I poo pooed it to death and then I was sucked into the second Bachelorette (with tall dipshit Meredith) by my cousin, Jen and an ex-coworker, Megan. At that point, I became an addict. That being said I never saw the first Bachelorette. I knew nothing of Trista. (Fuck, I hate her name.) However, I did see THE WEDDING. The televised wedding on ABC. The televised wedding on ABC where she had not one, but two dresses. The televised wedding where she had not one, but two dresses and proceeded to cry because her betrothed dare have a fuckin' bachelor party. I HATE THAT FUCKIN BITCH. Her voice makes me want to rip out my eyelashes. I knew knew knew that she would weasle her way back onto tv. I mean the bitch was tickled to pieces when she walked out and saw fuckin' helicopters hovering noisily above her sacred ceremony. Frankly I am amazed that she has managed to live in Colorado and has not freaked out and left her way too nice husband. Why does this girl get under my skin so bad? I just detest her and yet she is coming BACK TO TV. I may cancel my cable. OK, no, I won't. I will, however, steer clear of that show. Have I mentioned that I hate Trista?

Elizabeth at 9:13 PM


Should have snatched him up

Originally uploaded by alexiecfo.
This is Christian brushing his teeth with a battery operated tooth brush with Sponge Bob Square pants on it. He strolled around the house in his grasshoper outfit just buzzing away brushing all 6 teeth. I could just eat this kid.

Elizabeth at 4:07 PM


The Gager

Originally uploaded by alexiecfo.
This picture does not show the true wonder that is the Poop, but I got this one quick this morning. Man, he is a cutie. :)

Elizabeth at 12:51 PM


My most prized possession

Originally uploaded by alexiecfo.
I know the pic is blurry but I expect nothing but love like y'all blather all over Dooce, ok? I want "Brilliant shot!!" type of comments. Anyways, I love this set and think it is gorgeous. :)

Elizabeth at 12:20 PM


Hair care products

Originally uploaded by alexiecfo.
I only use shampoo and condition - Pantene. My hair is pretty much product free.

Elizabeth at 12:19 PM


Stuff Portrait Sunday....I know I am late.

The ugliest thing in my house

Originally uploaded by alexiecfo.

Elizabeth at 12:09 PM


I love these things.....

This was snagged from Weetzie's site - if you are not reading it, get on the ball, sistah. Oh jeez, I just heard a crash and loud meow from the kitchen. Perhaps I will investigate before I put my own answers.

A.)5 Things you May Not Know about my Time in School
1.)I was a great student but when I got to high school, I found people waaaay smarter than me and that messed with my confidence.
2.)I had a horrible boyfriend who cheated on me repeatedly and yet, I took him back several times.
3.)Despite mastering math with little effort, calculus kicked my ass.
4.)I will never ever ever go to a high school reunion. Some things are just in the past and that's it.
5.)I never got to go to a Prom with someone I actually liked.

B.) Five Things You May Not Know About the Job/s I Have (or Had)
1.)I waited tables for over 5 years and while there were times I liked it, overall it is the worst job I have ever dealt with.
2.)I met my husband at work.
3.)I am responsible for billing out 7.5 hours a day and frequently come up short.
4.)I have never done the wild thing at work.
5.)I would quit my job in a minute if we could afford it.

C.) Five Things You May Not Know About My Online Life:
1) I like being part of the cyber neighborhood.
2) I think it is cathartic to write stuff in my blog.
3) I started out reading Dooce's blog and am now so kinda over it because of the absolute idolatry. There are a lot out there who are better writers who do not get even half the traffic she does. I do still love her writing normally though.
4) I love to shop online, especially for BOOKS cuz they are so much fun to get in the mail!
5) I love reading other people's blog entries.

E.) Five Things You May Not Know About My Home Life:
1) I am anti-housework though I love a clean house.
2) I lovc to stay in bed on weekends and sometimes wish I could just stay there.
3) I talk to the TV at times, usually swearing at Bush or his ilk.
4) I will never allow my home to smell like animals despite the fact that two cats and one dog live here.
5) I love having a big kitchen even though I cook NEVER.

F.) Five Things You May Not Know that I Desperately Want:
1) A healthy baby.
2) To quit worrying about what is going on in other people's lives and focus on what is in front of me.
3) To be laid back and not always angst-filled.
4) To be able to pay our bills ON TIME and have a little left over for some fun.
5) To see the Steelers play at Heinz field and kick the living shit out of Dallas - live and in person, baby.

G.) Five Things I'm Absolutely Terrified Of:
1) Never having a child and never experiencing pregnancy.
2) Someone figuring out that I do not know what the fuck I am doing at work half the time.
3) Depression...going down in that black hole.
4) What will happen when my dad dies
5) Being caught in a small space for a long period of time.

3 Screen Names You Have:
1. AlexieCFO
2. Southern Fried Girl
3. Steelerfan831 - old one

3 Things You Like About Yourself:

1. I am good in a crisis.
2. I am a good friend.
3. I have gone though a lot of shit and it has not beat me yet.

3 Things You Hate/Dislike About Yourself:

1. Too judgmental.
2. No patience for anything.
3. Always suffering from the "grass is greener" syndrome - working on that one now.

3 Parts of Your Heritage:
1. German
2. English
3. Irish

3 Things You're Wearing Right Now:

1. Pink nighshirt
2. Bath and Body works lotion
3. underwear

3 New Things You Want to Try in the Next 12 months:

1 Getting my ass knocked up - well, not my ass exactly.
2. Putting my health as a priority.
3. Working on myself - becoming a better person.

3 Things You Want in Your Relationship:
1. Sense of humor
2. Honesty
3. True and sincere companionship

3 Things You Just Can't Do:
1. Let shit lie with the ex-wife from HELL.
2. Kill a big flying cockroach with anything but a giant stream of raid. The whole smashing it with a shoe thing is just not gonna happen. CRUNCH. ew ew ew
3. Sit through a movie without peeing.

3 of Your Favorite Hobbies:
1. Reading
2. Watching movies
3. Playing with the pupper.

3 Careers You've Considered (don't include what you do now):
1. Attorney - specifically a DA
2. Veternarian - but then I realized they have to put animals down and I thought the therapy would end up eating up my income.
3. Teacher - briefly when I was a wee lass - then I realized other people's kids can be horrible.

3 Places You Want to Go on Vacation:
1. Maui
2. Greece
3. Savannah, GA

3 Things You Want to do Really Badly Right Now:
1. Eat about 20 Reese cups that are somehow miraculously fat free.
2. Pee - yes I have to pee already.
3. Avoid the work I brought home, but I gotta do it.

3 Things You Want to Do Before You Die:
1. See Myekanous.
2. Experience pregnancy and watch the ultrasound and feel the kicks and the whole shebang.
3. Join the Big Sister organization.

I like this list because it makes you think about things that do not normally cross your mind. Hope this helps you know me a little better. I am off to pee now.

Elizabeth at 10:18 AM


Thursday, May 12, 2005

Stolen from Weetzie....

You're Duck! You love being outdoors and having
fun, although you occassionally (very rarely,
but it still happens) lapse into pretty bad
depressions. You're happy with most of the
aspects of your life, and work to mend those
that you aren't happy with.

Which Weetzie Bat character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Elizabeth at 3:19 PM


TAG!!! You're it.

I’m supposed to choose 5 things from this here list and complete a subsequent “If I could be . . .” thought. Then I tag three other folks to keep it going. I was tagged by Spurious - how cute.

If I could be a scientist
If I could be a farmer
If I could be a musician
If I could be a doctor, I would make sure that I would warm up my hands and that horrible speculum thing they invade you with. I know warmth breeds germs but COME ON PEOPLE.
If I could be a painter
If I could be a gardener
If I could be an architect
If I could be a linguist
If I could be a psychologist
If I could be an athlete, I'd so talk my way into the boys locker room
If I could be a lawyer, I would realize that doing shit at the last fuckin' minute only stresses out my staff and when I pull a file, I would put the fuckin' thing back to-fuckin'-gether and.....let's just stop there. I could go for days on that bad boy.

If I could be a professor
If I could be a world famous blogger
If I could be a justice on any one court in the world
If I could be married to any current famous political figure
If I could be a missionary
If I could be a writer
If I could be an innkeeper
If I could be a chef, then the fast food joints in my 'hood would so be lacking in business.
If I could be a llama-rider
If I could be an astronaut
If I could be a librarian
If I could be a bonnie pirate, I would so go find Johnny Depp and do NC-17 rated things to him.

So Katie, Lawbrat, and Vaida,y'all are oficially tagged. Have fun!!!!!

Elizabeth at 8:36 AM


Wednesday, May 11, 2005

Should be working but I am not

I was not born and raised here but this made me laugh because it is so damn accurate. Anyone who has spent even 5 minutes in New Orleans will recognize some of these facts. :)

You Know You're From New Orleans When...

Your sunglasses fog up when you step outside

You reinforce your attic to store Mardi Gras beads

Your baby’s first words are "gumbo" and "whereyat"

You save newspapers, not for recycling but for tablecloths at crawfish boils

When you give directions you use "lakeside” and “riverside' not north & south

Your ancestors are buried above the ground.

You get on a green trolley car to go to the park and a red one to the French Quarter

You listen to holiday songs such as "the 12 yats of Christmas" and "Santa and his reindeer used to live next door"

You walk on the "banquet" (sidewalk) and stand in the "neutral ground" (area of ground between a two sided street) "by ya mommas" (by your mother's house).

Someone asks for directions and you stop and help them with a smile

You start an angel food cake with a roux.

Watching "Wild Kingdom" inspires you to write a cookbook.

You think a lobster is a crawfish on steroids.

You think boudin, hogshead cheese, and a Bud is a bland diet.

You think Ground Hog Day and the Boucherie Festival are the same holiday.

You take a bite of five-alarm chili and reach for the Tabasco.

Fred's Lounge in Mamou means more to you than the Grand Ole Opry.

You have an *envie* for something instead of a craving.

You use a "#3" washtub to cover your lawn mower or your outboard motor.

You use two or more pirogues to cover your tomatoes to protect them from the late frost.

You use a gill net to play tennis, badminton, or volleyball.

The horsepower of your outboard motor is greater than that of your car motor.

You pass up a trip abroad to go to the Crawfish Festival in Breaux Bridge.

The four basic food groups are boiled seafood, broiled seafood, fried seafood and beer

You are asked to name the holy trinity and your reply is "onions, celery, bell pepper."

You let your black coffee cool, and find that it has gelled.

You describe a link of boudin and cracklins as "breakfast."

Every once in a while, you have waterfront property.

Your mama announces each morning, "Well, I've got the rice cooking ... what will we have for dinner?"

None of your potential vacation destinations are north of the old Mississippi River Bridge (US 190).

You refer to Louisiana winters as "Gumbo Weather."

You get a disappointing look from your wife and describe it as, "She passed me a pair of eyes."

You think of gravy as a beverage.

You greet your long lost friend at the Lafayette Regional Airport with "AAAAAAAYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE."

You sit down to eat boiled crawfish and your host says, "Don't eat the dead ones,"
and you know what he means.

You learned Bourre the hard way: Holding yourself upright in your crib.

You don't know the real names of your friends, only their nicknames.

You give up Tabasco for Lent

You worry about a deceased family member returning in spring floods.

You don't learn until high school that Mardi Gras is not a national holiday.

You push little old ladies out of the way to catch Mardi Gras throws.

You leave a parade with footprints on your hands.

You believe that purple, green, and gold look good together

Your last name isn't pronounced the way it's spelled.

You know what a nutria is but you still pick it to represent your baseball team.

You like your rice and your politics dirty.

No matter where else you go in the world, you are always disappointed in the food.

Your loved one dies and you book a jazz band before you call the coroner.

Your accent sounds nothing like Harry Connick, Jr's.

You can sing these jingles by heart: "Rosenberg's, Rosenberg's, 1825 Tulane;" "At the beach, at the beach, the Pontchartrain Beach..."

You ask, "How they running?" and "Are they fat?" but, you're inquiring about seafood quality and not the Cresent City Classic.

When a hurricane is imminent, you have a lot more faith in Nash Roberts than some Super Doppler 6000.

Your town is low on the education chart, high on the obesity chart and you don't care because you're No. 1 on the party chart.

Nothing shocks you. Period. Ever.

Being in a jam at Tulane and Broad isn't the same as being stuck in traffic.

Your idea of health food is a baked potato instead of fries with your seafood platter.

You have to take your coffee and favorite coffeemaker with you on a three-day trip.

You have sno-ball stains on your shoes.

You call tomato sauce "red gravy."

Your middle name is your mother's maiden name, or your father's mother's maiden name, or your mother's mother's maiden name, or your grandmother's mother's maiden name, or your grandfather's mother's maiden name.

On certain spring days, Crawfish Monica is your breakfast.

Your house payment is less than your utility bill.

You've done your laundry in a bar.

You don't show your "pretties" during Mardi Gras.

You know that Tchoupitoulas is a street and not a disease.

You "boo" the mayor on national television.

You wear sweaters in because it ought to be cold.

Your grandparents are called "Maw-Maw" and "Paw-Paw."

.Your Santa Claus rides an alligator and your favorite Saint is a football player.

You suck heads, eat tail, sing the blues and you actually know where you got them shoes.

You shake out your shoes before putting them on.

You don't think it inappropriate to refer to a large adult male as "Li'l Bubba."

You know why you should never, ever swim by the Lake Pontchartrain steps (for more than one reason).

You cringe every time you hear an actor with a Southern or Cajun accent in a "New Orleans-based" movie or TV show.

You have to reset your clocks after every thunderstorm.

You waste more time navigating back streets than you would if you just sat in traffic.

You still call the Fairmont Hotel, the Roosevelt.

You consider garbage cans a legal step to protecting your parking space on a public street.

You fall asleep to the soothing sounds of four box fans.

Your one-martini lunch becomes a five-bloody mary afternoon... and you keep your job.

Being in a jam at Tulane and Broad isn't the same as being stuck in traffic.

You're walking in the French Quarter with a plastic cup of beer. When it starts to rain, you cover your beer instead of your head.

You eat dinner out and spend the entire meal talking about all the other good places you've eaten.

You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from New Orleans.

Get Your Own "You Know You're From" Meme Here

More cool things for your blog at

Elizabeth at 11:02 AM


Daily reads and laughs

The list at the right is by no means complete. These are the blogs that I read just about faithfully every single day - sometimes checking more than once for updates. Seriously it is a sickness. Anyways, I know I missed a few that I do read and I will update it as needed. So I apologize if your name is not over there - chances are I read what you have to say (even if I do not always comment) but just forgot your blog name since I get to it via another blog. Once the list is complete, you people will see why I have no life. I sit at home reading this stuff all day. :)

Elizabeth at 10:48 AM


Many thanks.....

Big time thank yous go out to Kristine over at Random and Odd for pimpin' my blog the way she did. I assure you that I in no way had anything to do with the creativity of what you now see. All I did was go "um, looks good - here's my password." That was it for the work done on my end. If she ever offers to pimp your blog for ya, for the love of God, take the woman up on it, OK???

Thanks to everyone who likes the new look also. I just love it. Now all I need to do is add some pictures of the different facets of my life on here and it will be all good. :)

I have lots to update but believe it or not, I am busy as all get out at work and will have to do it later.

PS - summer is a-comin' down here in the Big Easy and I am not thrilled. Summer down here means AC set at 68 all day every day which translates into $200 light bills for me. It also means bad bad bad hair days. I long for fall already.

Elizabeth at 9:08 AM


Tuesday, May 10, 2005

The flagrant stealing is just never ending

I snagged this from Judy at Shut up dude. My thanks to her for this. :)

1. Your name spelled backwards. htebazilE
2. Where were your parents born? McKeesport, PA and Fineview, PA
3. What is the last thing you downloaded onto your computer? a pretty screen saver
4. What's your favorite restaurant? Houston's
5. Last time you swam in a pool? Oh man, it's been a while
6. Have you ever been in a school play? Years and years ago, can't even recall what it was.
7. How many kids do you want? I will take any at this point
8. Type of music you dislike most? Old twangy country and rap that does not sound very nice to women
9. Are you registered to vote? Yes. Democrat.
10. Do you have cable? Definitely.
11. Have you ever ridden on a moped? Yes, used to ride on one to school
12. Ever prank call anybody? When I was younger.
13. Ever get a parking ticket? Several
14. Would you go bungee jumping or sky diving? Good God no
15. Furthest place you ever traveled. Hawaii
16. Do you have a garden? I can't keep anything alive
17. What's your favorite comic strip? Calvin and Hobbes and The Far Side even though neither are in the paper anymore.
18. Do you really know all the words to your national anthem? Yes
19. Bath or Shower, morning or night? shower in the morning.
20. Best movie you've seen in the past month? Hmmmmm...not sure
21. Favorite pizza topping? Enough pepperoni to make my arteries instantaneously clog
22. Chips or popcorn? Depends on the mood
23. What color lipstick do you usually wear? Raisin by Revlon
24. Have you ever smoked peanut shells? So did not know you can do that
25. Have you ever been in a beauty pageant? Not that I am aware of.
26. Orange Juice or apple? both
27. Who was the last person you went out to dinner with and where did you dine? Went to Semolina with C.
28. Favorite type chocolate bar? Reese's Peanut Butter Cups (does that count?).
29. When was the last time you voted at the polls? The past election
30. Last time you ate a homegrown tomato? Been a while
31. Have you ever won a trophy? Yep
32. Are you a good cook? Nope, I suck
33. Do you know how to pump your own gas? Yes.
34. Ever order an article from an infomercial? No.
35. Sprite or 7-up? Sprite
36. Have you ever had to wear a uniform to work? Yes @ Applebees and Ruth's Chris
37. Last thing you bought at a pharmacy? Rx.
38. Ever throw up in public? I don't handle liquor well so Yes.
39. Would you prefer being a millionaire or find true love? $$$$$
40. Do you believe in love at first sight? Yes.
41. Ever call a 1-900 number? No...not yet ;)
42. Can ex's be friends? Depends on their relationship, but yes.
43. Who was the last person you visited in a hospital? Not sure really.
44. Did you have a lot of hair when you were a baby? Yes, I was born with a head of hair.
45. What message is on your answering machine? You've reached xxx-xxxx. No one is here to take your call so leave a message after the beep. Beep.
46. What's your all time favorite Saturday Night Live Character? Oh man, that's tough - I would have to say Rosanne Rosannadanna
47. What was the name of your first pet? A dog named Candy
48. What is in your purse? Wallet, organizer, lipstick, pressed powder, tampons, book I am currently reading, two bills I had to take care of, pens, lip stuff for chapping.
49. Favorite thing to do before bedtime? Read
50. What is one thing you are grateful for today? That my life seems to be calming down some

Elizabeth at 4:54 PM


Thursday, May 05, 2005

Nice to have this confirmed.......


Your Geek Profile:

Geekiness in Love: High

Academic Geekiness: Moderate

Fashion Geekiness: Low

Gamer Geekiness: None

General Geekiness: None

Internet Geekiness: None

Movie Geekiness: None

Music Geekiness: None

SciFi Geekiness: None

How Geeky Are You?

Elizabeth at 12:18 PM


Barely civil service

I just finished jury duty. Luckily the very full docket was whittled down to nothing due to settlements and attorneys waiving their rights to trial by jury in favor of bench trials. The chance of me being picked for a jury are slim to none anyway due to my profession but I still would have had to sit there ALL DAMN DAY. However, at least I live in the parish that I do and not in Orleans parish because that place is just an absolute clusterfuck. For those of you who have no idea, the fact that anything at all gets done in Orleans parish in the sluggish piece of antiquated machinery called the judicial system is a fuckin miracle. The people that work there are not well paid, generally not overly educated and for the most part, could not give two shits about doing their job well or even correctly. Before I am trampled on about how I am dogging these people out, let me also say that their jobs are thankless and they have to deal with attorneys - a fact that should lead to them getting hazard pay. All that being said, I have watched these people in the Orleans parish clerk's office work - and I use that term very LOOSELY. Anyway, I digress. Jury duty. The nailed me for today and my parish only forces me to a one day duty and then I am free for two years. I would be lying if I did not say I was thrilled for the break from work. As I have mentioned, going into work has been more taxing than usual. I won't go into details now because I don't really have time, but I hope that either the environment or my attitude improves soon. Let's hope.

Elizabeth at 11:44 AM


Tuesday, May 03, 2005

So very tired

My life has begun to exhaust me. Emotionally, physically, spiritually, etc. My home life is, in a word, unsatisfying. My work life, although calmed down considerably since the tearful tirades of last week, is not what I would call stellar. I am in a job that I did go to school for. What I do matters - at least to our clients it does. I do need to do my job well, but I just could not give less of a shit about it. I literally drag myself out of bed and into this job when all I really want to do is stay in bed and perhaps surf the net or just tinker around the house. I keep saying that I would love to work from home and I SO WOULD. I would give my eye teeth for that. To still be active and do something that I enjoy for the most part but to not have to deal with all that goes with a JOB - i.e. traffic, annoying fucktards that I work with, having to be in a good mood when I would really like to toss someone out a window, etc. I could do my job with minimal interuption. Of course, I say this because I have no children. People that have children and work from home must be either insane or totally organized.

Financial strains are getting to me as well. With the really nice tax refund that came in, I sat at the computer, check book in hand and paid bill after bill after bill as well as the plane tickets for Xmas time since I KNEW the money would never be there to purchase the tickets later. I caught up a lot but still there are things that are behind. Two fuckin hours paying bills. What the fuck do I have to show for that? I'll tell ya what - a shitty credit score. Every time I feel like I could possibly get ahead, something happens. Case in point - I owed my mother like 500 bucks for taking care of a vet bill from when the cat was super sick and needed surgery. I literally just paid her off on the 28th of April. Yesterday the dryer broke. I was like "you gotta be fuckin' kidding me." Ya know, I would even settle for breaking even. Let's not get crazy and say I want to be ahead. Fuck NO.

I have also taken very crappy care of myself. Why is it that when we really need to pamper ourselves and be nice to ourselves, we abuse our bodies to death? I mean, I do not smoke, do drugs or drink hardly at all, but I eat like shit - generally on the run. If it is not caffeinated with at least 27 grams of sugar per serving, I don't drink it. I tend to eat crap when I have had a bad day or just feel oooookey. Obviously lately, the oooooookey feeling has abounded because I can not remember the last time a veggie passed my lips. I can't even imagine the shape I would be in if I did drugs or drank like a fish. I would be dead.

This post sucks but it is where my head is right now. I am trying to keep things honest on here so that at some point I can go back and read and perhaps see some logical progression and hopefully some positive changes. Today is not a positive change day.

Elizabeth at 2:28 PM


Monday, May 02, 2005

Closer than you might think

I had the most low key weekend ever. Friday night and pretty much all day Saturday one would have needed a crowbar to pry my ass off the couch. I had the best of intentions of cleaning and like doing laundry and small things such as that, but can I just say that none of this occurred. Saturday night I had peace and quiet and elected to watch the Julia/Jude/Clive/Natalie movie, "Closer." In a word, wow. First off, the language - a tad salty. To hear Julia say, "Yes, he went down and me and I came." My mouth pretty much hung open the whole time. It was just so real - and so very close to my life at times.

I have gone back and forth about what to do with the rest of my life. Do I do the brave thing and jump forth in an effort to be happy? Do I do the safe thing and know that while my life won't suck, it won't be what I have always wanted it to be. Maybe one day I will sit down and write my story on here about how this all came to be and how I ended up in this mess, but today is not that day. I simply am not sure that I am brave or strong enough to handle all of this. How do I start all over? AGAIN??? Then again, how do I stand my life and avoid situations which make me want to vomit? Maybe vomit is too harsh a word. However, let's just say that I am not enjoying all that life has to offer, ok? Let's just say THAT.

I could think of a kabillion other things I would rather do than work today, but here I am. I am off to enjoy some of the nice weather and spend my lunch hour downstairs reading to finish this book that has taken me forever and a fuckin' day to read.

I do not expect an answer to this. I just want this question to go out into the blog world and perhaps the answer will just present itself to me. What will it finally take to make me happy?

Elizabeth at 1:01 PM


I am packing the U-Haul/boat as I type.....

American Cities That Best Fit You:

75% Honolulu
70% Austin
70% Seattle
65% Miami
65% Portland

Which American Cities Best Fit You?

Elizabeth at 10:58 AM